Barbara: "The Lady in Red!"

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Any woman that has lived within a 50 mile radius of her mother knows that when you start having children there is a magical exchange that takes place.  It's strange because you would think in all the years you've been alive that your mom would have told you that you are really one of the Marvel Comic X-Men.  Your mutant power suddenly kicks in or something because you COMPLETELY disappear and the only thing left are the grandchildren! Of course, since you have disappeared, your mother nobly takes it upon herself to open the very gates of Heaven (usually picking the locks thereof with a very long church hat pin) and pour out upon the children the very Riches of Glory!! (These riches usually manifest themselves in the forms of stuffed, fluffy items, frosted or chocolate chipped treats and/or anything bedazzled or glittery.)  She lavishes every whim of the cherished grandchildren (whether real of imagined) upon them that she can possibly muster.  If she could candy coat their baby booties, add a bubble gum center and keep them to give them back to the children at their respective wedding days, she would do it!  She sees it as her duty to reward the babies for simply having skin.....daily.  If any of this sounds familiar, you might have a Grammy.

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My mother, Mrs. Barbara Jean Mills-Hamilton, is a 5'2'', red-headed, curly-haired, Bible verse quoting, Western Channel watching, "red is my favorite color" wearing, ice cream loving force of nature!  She is also "The Grammy", and being such is the emotional trump card to everything that happens at SRB!  As she feistily steps out of her Kia Sorrento, tells the dogs to shut up as she enters the yard, still stays on her phone conversation and holds her duffel bag she calls a purse over her elbow (as true ladies do) while balancing a foiled paper plate of goodies that she was given by her Service Club sister, you can't help but chuckle as she hot steps it to to porch.  You open the door because her hands are full (and because royalty demands these things) and she turns on her Superman X-ray vision (which apparently works even through bi-focals) and sees each of the grandchildren in their respective rooms and beelines for them.  I stand in awe as I swear she actually teleported THROUGH my body and straight to them!  Could she always do this stuff and I just missed it?

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Here's the thing... a Grammy is just a little opinionated, nostalgic, paranoid, irreverent ball of sunshine that warms your heart...but blinds you!  I hate to admit it, but she is vital to the balance of our yin and yang!  When she is not here, Devon is miserable because he has no one to argue with!  When I need to watch a good chick flick, but have someone ask me questions through the WHOLE THING.....who can I call on?  The Grammy!  Who will insist that she is COMPLETELY neglected by EVERYONE in the house as she eats my last Greek yogurt with her feet up on the couch while watching her 3rd episode of Bonanza that YOU had to turn to for her because she just doesn't understand why you don't get a remote that works?  The Grammy!  When the kids need an "impartial" judge who will ALWAYS rule in their favor against the parents, where do they go?  The Grammy!  Grammy is an institution all to herself.........why?......Because she says so! 

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